Over the past few day i have been presented with some issues that have given me the opportunity to observe a few interesting behaviors..
Recently my cousin had his girlfriend over on my grandma’s birthday. The rest of the family were over as well for dinner for my grandma’s birthday. My cousins girlfriend was sitting at the dinner table when everyone was trying to eat burping and farting and bragging about it. To me anyone with any sense of decency would find this awful and offensive. So i made a jokey post about it on facebook. People made a few funny comments and got a good chuckle. Haha then it was done and forgotten.
Apparently this is somehow tarnishing the family honor and making fun of my cousin in some way. If i had a girlfriend who behaved like that when i took her to my family’s house for my grandma’s birthday dinner then i would expect some comments. she does it so deal with it.
My aunt suddenly decided to defend her, whom she does not like, and says she has brain damage. She does not have brain damage that keeps her from knowing good behavior from bad. She just has no manners.
I also happened to join a few groups about it being rude for people to come over unannounced. Well you know family comes over that’s different. And my aunt is moving in this is her home now so naturally you don’t have to be announce in your own home or if someone comes to see her they wouldn’t have to be announced to ME. That applied to me specifically. Me, myself and i. If a friend or whoever comes to see me specifically then yes i prefer them to call first. I don’t go to other peoples houses without doing the same.
My aunt assumed it’s all about her so naturally went off without asking what’s this supposed to mean or anything. She lashes out before she thinks. Anyway. I try to explain myself to some people in my family and it’s like i’m speaking in Martian. They just don’t understand.
They all say if i make jokes about my cousins girlfriends horrible manners then it’s like making fun of him and it tarnishes the family honor whatever that means. Family pride is an illusion, a joke. A handed down false sense of self importance.
Anyway it’s my feeling that my aunt should have approached me like a grown up and told me she was offended by my post and i would have taken it down gladly and apologized. Instead she blows up and lashes out. I don’t find that an aproppiate way to handle something like that by an adult. Let alone an adult in their 50;s.
But instead of dealing with anything my family prefers to sweep things under the rug and make them go away. I’m of a moe rational and logical mind and prefer reality. I would prefer to deal with something and get it resolved rather than to ignore it. So given that i just can’t understand why i feel like i am being punished for the poor behavior of others.
I have a feeling i will be meditating on these things for some time to come.
I would like to add that i did apologize. Twice in fact. But i guess it's not a real apology since i explained myself. Even this will probably cause some sort of backlash. Whatever.
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